SEC Officially Enters Alternate Dimension

Just another weekend in the SEC ladies and gentlemen. No. 2 Alabama squeaks by Kentucky one week after dismantiling Georgia in Athens. Florida pounds a pathetic Arkansas team one week after losing to Ole Miss...at home. Tennessee hangs on for an ugly home win against Northern Illinois. Oh, and SEC East leader and undefeated Vanderbilt beats Auburn in prime time with ESPN's College Gameday in Nashville.

Yeah, that sounds normal. Assuming the sky is green, the grass is blue, and Lindsay Lohan is a neurosurgeon. The college football season is always an unpredicatble beast. But the SEC is supposed to be rock rolid each year.

Florida, Tennessee, Georgia, LSU and Auburn are supposed to be very good. Alabama, South Carolina and Arkansas are supposed to be good. The rest of the league is supposed to be average, with Vandy and one of the Mississippi schools being downright ACC-bad.

Welcome to the New World Order. Don't adjust your TV sets or spit out your cornflakes, Vanderbilt is indeed the No. 13 team in the land. They really do sit atop the SEC East, ahead of Georgia and Florida. And yes, they did just beat Auburn on national television.

Meanwhile, October is the time of pumpkins. And our favorite big orange blob, Phil Fulmer is currently in the SEC's cellar after having to hang on in the final minutes for a home victory over Northern Illinois. If you're a Vol fan our you have a weak stomach, skip to the next paragraph. The Vols racked up 156 passing yards and 69 rushing yards against a 2-3 team from the MAC. Yikes.

How the Home-Depot Organge Nation has refrained from burning down Fullmer's house and drowning offensive coordinator Dave Clawson in the Tennessee River is beyond my comprehension. Needless to say, if things get ugly for the Vols in Athens as expected, Fullmer may be on his way out. Unfortunately for those who want to see him go, he has a huge buyout in his contract and the UT front offices may not want to eat that.

Why not hire Bruce Pearl? He could wear orange blazers and take his shirt off, while calling out the other team's fans a la Scott Hall and Kevin Nash. He could hire Pat Summitt is offensive coordinator, and she could double as cheerleader while the Vols were on defense. Bring in WNBA Rookie of the Year and MVP Candace Parker at quarterback, and the Vols will be back in the Citrus Bowl in no time.

But seriously, all is not well in the state of football. When the "nerd school" in Nashville is winning your division and your team can't put together anything resembling a coherent effort, something has to be done. Fullmer already benched starting quarterback Jonathan Crompton in favor of sophomore Nick Stephens. While Stephens' numbers against NIU were hardly impressive (10 of 17, 156 yards, 1 TD), at least the Vols won. However, they come to Athens to face a wounded bunch of Bulldogs that have plenty of reason to be pissed. They squandered a chance to move into the No.1 spot in the country by getting blown out at home by Alabama. Perhaps more importantly, they have been embarrassed by the Vols the past two years.

Vandy, on the other hand, just keeps getting more and more interesting. Every week, we think that this will be the week we come back to reality. And every week, the Commodores laugh at us from behind their physics books. The Dores are doing it with defense and some gritty play from a guy named Mackenzi. While Auburn's offense has been putrid all year, the Dores managed to hold them to just 208 total yards on Saturday. That's impressive, I don't care who you play.

Vanderbilt's next three games are at Miss. St, at Georgia and at home against Duke. If the Dores can manage to upset Georgia again, they could very well be 8-0 before hosting Florida on Nov. 8. In other words, Vanderbilt has a legitimate (while still unlikely) shot at the SEC East crown. If they beat either Georgia or Florida they have a VERY good shot. Regardless, the Dores should be going bowling for the first time in a long time, and it should be on New Years Day.

My brain is melting just from thinking about this whole scenario. I love seeing Vandy make this run. It gives ACC "smart schools" like Duke no excuse for being doormats.

Anyway, check back later in the week for some more thoughts on Georgia's meeting with the Vols, among other things. I have the takehome test from Hell to complete this week, so it may be a while and you may see some more Bill Kitson on the blog.

Let me know what you think about SEC football in Tennessee. What's more likely: the Vols finishing the season last in the SEC East or the Dores finishing the season first? How long will Bobby Johnson stay in Nashville? Will either team beat Georgia in the next two weeks?